Why not do a baby toss?

Wedding season is here.  Bleh.

I always have mixed feelings about going to weddings.  While I want to be supportive and excited for my friend getting married, I can’t say that I enjoy going to weddings all that much.  In all honesty, I am one of those guys who takes advantage of the open bar at weddings.  A wedding without alcohol is a an event one step shy of hell for a person like me.

I am already trying to prepare myself for the barrage of comments regarding my singleness and how someday I will meet the right person.  I told my friend that I will be trying to sneak away during the garter toss, as I will be one of five sorry souls having to stand in front of everyone, shamefully admitting to our singleness.  Unfortunately, my friend has threatened to call me out on the PA system… so not exactly sure what’s going to happen there.

I told him that he should start a new tradition of calling out all the married couples without kids to the dance floor.  They then could take a baby doll and toss it over their head and see who catches it.  My friend told me that as funny as it would be, it wouldn’t work out because some couples are unable to have kids.  I told him some people are unable to get married…


3 thoughts on “Why not do a baby toss?

  1. Honestly, I’ve gotten to the point where I don’t attend weddings unless it’s someone I’ve known all my life. I absolutely love your idea of the baby toss! And why should the baby toss be sensitive to people who can’t have kids? Garter tossing is the ultimate in zero sensitivity.

  2. This remark made me laugh out loud. I’ve never heard someone make a comment about a “baby toss” at a wedding, but can I say I will now quote you if a garter toss comes into the conversation at any wedding I attend. You make your point with humor and verve. Thank you!

  3. This is a great post, Sojourner. Excellent point. I’m sorry that some friends are insensitive to what’s going on in your life. I wish people wouldn’t be so dumb sometimes.

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