The great news is that I finally landed a job! I start tomorrow and I am extremely grateful to be employed again. It will be nice to not have to figure out how to spend all the hours of my day and constantly trying to remain focused on not wasting my time. While the job isn’t exactly along the lines of what I hoped for, it is at least an opportunity to work with and help people.
The somewhat scary part of all of this is that my commitment issues are now springing up. As long as I didn’t have a job, there was always the possibility of moving on. Now I have to actually look for an apartment, find a roommate, sign a lease, buy furniture, and commit to remaining in a location for a period of time. Right now all my possessions are nice stored in 4 boxes. There is so much freedom in not having to worry about stuff. Perhaps I just need to grow up and recognize that responsible adults don’t live transient lives. There are definitely going to be some hard changes coming up. I am sure it will be good for me in the long run, despite how difficult it will be initially.
The thing that scares me the most is that I can’t runaway now when things get rough… I came back wanting to commit to community. Time for me to nut up or shut up.