Yup, today was one of those days.
I finally landed another job interview. While I was thankful for the opportunity, I soon realized that this job would not be setting me up for future progress into the field that I want to go to. I don’t even know if I will get the job, but my fear is that if I do get it, I need to take it. Any job is better than no job.
Anyways, after getting back from the interview I was a bit stressed and frustrated. I came back to the apartment and of course was faced with all of my vices simultaneously. Vice #1: Porn. #2: Masturbation. #3: Food. #4: Television.
After failing to fight Vice #1, I soon fell into all four. Damn.
Now that my afternoon is completely wasted, I of course go into the phase of self-loathing. As always, I feel stupid for not being able to control myself and falling into the temptations that I know I will be facing. I hate when I fall into this cycle. Particularly when I have been trying my best to be in the Word and spend time in prayer. My relationship with God has been good… which makes days like today even more disappointing.
I feel like I have been extremely intentional in how I go about each day. I try to make lists and stick to them. After seeing how today went, I think I am going to have to stay outside more often. Perhaps I will have to start paying rent at Starbucks, seeing how much time I end up spending there. I also have come to realize that when I do land a job and need to find a place to live, I probably shouldn’t live alone. While it can be such an inconvenience to live with people, I don’t think I have a choice.